Sunday Funday....

Neighbors, Jello, Burgers and Hot Dogs...

Yeah, it's going to be one of those nights. I keep falling asleep though. Had some serious narcoleptic moments. I was watching Enchanted, thinking again about J, who I always think about during quiet moments- but especially as the counterpart in my own romantic life-movie, and I fell asleep on the couch.

I don't sleep like that. It is actually quite rare for me to do. I got rest last night, so I'm not quite sure why I'm dragging ass so much today.

M came over this morning, wanting to know if I wanted to do a backyard deal with the kids, she was thinking about grilling out. I made jello shots and mac and cheese. She was doing the hamburgers and hot dogs.

I'm contemplating going down to the basement and finally digging out my box of paints. I have the canvas out now, it's only a matter of time before I actually do it. But the pain I've been feeling, the odd sense of creativity that's being stifled. I think it might finally be time tonight.

I just don't want to be distracted when I do start painting. I think tonight will actually be perfect. I'm going to get my music all set up, get my paints out, probably indulge in a few more jello shots before touching my brush to the canvas.

Yes, it sounds like a plan.



Dazed and Confused

Have you ever been living your life and at one moment feel like you're not living your life, but watching it be lived? Kind of an out of body surreal experience. I've had a few moments like that recently - and it's usually one of those things that has happened on occasion, but lately, it's been pretty regular. It's weird, but cool... like you can take a step back, look in the mirror at your own self living/breathing/doing. But for a moment, it doesn't really feel like you, but more like you're watching someone else.

I guess that's an odd way to explain it. Despite what you may be thinking, these moments happen during totally sober times... No alcohol involved. Sometimes it's while I'm at work, other times while I'm at home or out. I just suddenly get a universal view of my life.


What now?
So I'm trying to figure out the rest of the details. Find a way to save more money. Find a way to make more money. Find a way to never have to worry about money again.

God gave me some of these talents, and damn it, I better put some of them to good use.

Ok, time for the grill out. I should probably finally get myself off the bed and try to actually spend some time outside.